Jillian R.
What is the best way to grab your entire network's attention?

Change your relationship status, of course.

And no, "Look at me, world!" won't do as much. You know what I'm talking about, every time you see a friend change his/her relationship status, their friends go wild on a comment-field-trip. Don't get me wrong, I read these comments with (much) interest too sometimes. But then again, when our friends are clearly upset about whatever it is which makes them think their relationship is "complicated", should we really rub salt on the wound?

I'm an avid Facebook user. Based on my observation, let's look at the types of friends everyone has on their list(

1. The Questionable Sympathizer
When someone becomes single again, the Questionable Symphatizer always goes "Oh hun/dear, are you ok?" Obviously "No, I'm not alright, I'm in shambles and my mascara is dripping off my chin" won't be the reply.
Rule #1: Don't ask if you already know the answer. I say, call the person on his/her phone or leave a private message.

2. The Busy Body
The busy body will normally be a friend of either one or both parties and will check between the two profiles to see if it's a practical joke, or if they're just having a fight, or should they have removed all traces of their "relationship" then the Busy Body has confirmed his/her suspicion.
Rule #2: If you care that much, I say refer to Rule #1.

If the relationship change is the opposite though;

you get:- 

3. The Over-Enthusiastic
These friends will always belt our their congratulations and THEN ask who's the lucky guy/girl; and THEN request for pictures if responded to. The Over-Enthusiastic reacts the same way to engagements and marriages.
Rule #3: Go on, celebrate the end of your friends' singlehood - there's nothing wrong with that.

"John Smith went from being "In a relationship" to "It's complicated"

Now, this one is tricky, if the friend was previously engaged/married/in a relationship, there will be more comments; namely by the Symphatizer and the Busy Body. Commonly used terms include: "What happened, hun/dear?" and "Are you okay, hun/dear?"

But if the person was single prior to this recent update, then there will be;

4. The Busy Body's Buddy

Similar to the Busy Body, the "Buddy" will click on photo albums of the said friend looking for "clues" as to why their relationship - existent or not, is "complicated"

Rule #4: Consider the fact that maybe the friend was bored and was experimenting with different settings.

All the above statuses will appear seemingly more interesting if the parties involved replies. Drama almost always ensues.

The above guide was not written with the intention to ridicule or tease as it is only my general, honest observation. Sometimes More often than not, people change their statuses to see who still really cares - nothing wrong with that. Who doesn't like attention.

"John Smith is now "In an open relationship" with himself"

But then again, changing one's status to every available option on Facebook within a few hours is just wrong.
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1 Response
  1. 2ommy Says:

    facebook is an addiction, like a drug. :P

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